Jason Clarke (@jasonclarke)

Surrey, BC, Canada

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @jasonclarke ever

November 2009

@chrismaddocks Oh right, the AI application! I thought that was magical back in the day. Reminds me, I need to sort through all my CDs.

via Twitter for iPhone in reply to chrismaddocks

chrismaddocks Checking hundreds of floppy disks before turfing them. Bringing back memories. Best find so far: Dr. Sbaitso

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 6:19 PM, Nov 30th, 2009 via API)

@chrismaddocks Is Dr. Sbaitso that text-to-speech engine from the early 90’s?

via Twitter for iPhone in reply to chrismaddocks

shitmydadsays “It’s never the right time to have kids, but it’s always the right time for screwing. God’s not a dumbshit. He knows how it works.”

via web (retweeted on 6:11 PM, Nov 30th, 2009 via API)

Using keyboard shortcuts to do repetitive tasks on my computer makes me feel like I’m in the future. That and this cool tinfoil hat.

via Twitter for iPhone

Check out what that hill in the default XP wallpaper “Bliss” looks like today: http://www.goldinsenneby…

via Twitterrific

Magic Highway USA http://tinyurl.com/btba5m <- classic Disney predictions from 1958 about transportation. Hat tip to @gruber.

via API

My wife just finished a half-marathon. You know, running. A lot. Practicing to get away from me? Just kidding, congratulations Fran! #fb

via Twitter for iPhone

A: Eating Pop-Tarts and watching Mythbusters after the kids go to bed
Q: What’s a clear sign your wife’s away

via Twitter for iPhone

I wonder if fighter pilots hate the Kenny Loggins song “Danger Zone” as much as I imagine they do? #fb

via Twitter for iPhone

Easy for celebs to get in trouble online now. Need 2 B responsible.
http://m.apnews.com/ap/d…

via Twitter for iPhone

What I learned at breakfast: when a 4 year-old offers you his seat, it’s wise to check for spills before sitting down! #fb

via Twitter for iPhone

@SlvrLambStudios She’s running in the Seattle half-marathon on Sunday, and went down early with friends to shop and hang out.

via Twitter for iPhone in reply to SlvrLambStudios

Fran’s away this weekend. While mommy’s away, the children will play. Oh wait, I have to be the adult now?

via Twitterrific

Free band name: Doogie and the Howsers

via Twitterrific

@MikeTRose Five-hour naps (even unscheduled ones) are wonderful. Colour me envious!

via Twitterrific in reply to MikeTRose

RT @rands When you say, “You’re the boss” I hear “We got together and all agree that you’re about to screw this up”

via Twitterrific

My iPhone is jailbroken - is it insecure? http://bit.ly/5MwUaZ [DLS post]

via Twitterrific

Want some Krakus, the caffeine-free instant coffee substitute from Poland? @glentrainor, I’m looking at you.

via Twitterrific

Shouldn’t it be spelled fonetic?

via Twitterrific

Where can I buy that awesome new Slap Bet game? It looks like a riot!

via Twitter for iPhone

@geehoneybee She types really fast, so probably a bunch of them in a row…

via Twitterrific in reply to geehoneybee

My wife mistyped the word “doing” on her iPhone, and it was auto-corrected to “euthanasia”. What the hell?

via Twitterrific

@SuePolinsky Totally agree - no quoted text is craziness!

via Twitterrific in reply to SuePolinsky

RT @chartier: I hate bottom replies in email. I know what I wrote, I wrote it. I don’t need to be told again. Just show me your response.

via Twitter for iPhone

RT @ebertchicago OMG! Man in coma 23 years was aware of everything. http://j.mp/88mn0G

via Twitterrific

RT @rands The formula is pretty simple — if it looks like I don’t care, I don’t.

via Twitterrific

Life is very short, and there’s no time… for fussing and fighting my friend.

via Twitterrific

@ebertchicago I’m Canadian, and spent about a year obsessing about the assassination in my early teens. Stone’s JFK was closure, sort of.

via Twitter for iPhone in reply to ebertchicago

RT @jen_robbins: Hates vampires, there are no movies to see

via Twitter for iPhone

Where Should I Eat? Fast Food Edition (flowchart) http://bit.ly/2oWW52 via @miketrose (I live in Canada, and TH is not the only option!)

via Twitterrific

“When attributing a tweet as a quote, is it he tweeted or he twittered?” -@APStylebook (Actually, the proper term is “tooted”. No kidding.)

via Twitter for iPhone

RT @FakeAPStylebook In a double entendre, write a figure of speech so it can be taken in two ways—from the front and from the rear.

via Twitterrific

I just noticed the cowbell in the Beatles’ “Drive My Car”, awesome. << Insert more cowbell joke here >>

via Twitterrific

Nothing like listening to early Beatles to put you in a good mood.

via Twitterrific

It’s after 10:30 and I just remembered I brought coffee to work in a travel mug. Busy much? Amazingly, it’s still hot. #fb

via Twitterrific

http://www.techcrunch.co… - TechCrunch is criticizing http://www.engadget.com for attention-seeking? Wow, kettle / pot!

via Twitter for iPhone

Thanks to a generous co-worker, looking forward to taking in a Vancouver Giants game at the Pacific Coliseum tonight with my eldest son!

via Twitterrific

I have a love/hate relationship with coffee: 15 Things worth knowing about coffee: http://theoatmeal.com/co… via @patricknorton

via Twitterrific

RT @FakeAPStylebook When describing earth-moving machinery, make sure to distinguish between regular bulldozers and deadly killdozers.

via Twitterrific

“You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.” Winston Churchill via http://bit.ly/312QOM

via Twitterrific

Black socks with Crocks = ROCKS! #fb

via Twitter for iPhone

I just unlocked the “I don’t give a shit about Foursquare” badge on @foursquare. Now to find the “auto-unfollow for mentioning FS” feature.

via Twitter for iPhone

RT @YouQuotedQuotes: Do not free a camel of the burden of his hump; you may be freeing him from being a camel. ~ Gilbert Keith Chesterton

via Twitter for iPhone

RT @KenLevine How many of your Facebook “friends” would actually come to your funeral? And of those, how many would poke you?

via Twitterrific

RT @jen_robbins: @jasonclarke “milo’s dad came over to play polkadots!” <- that’s awesome! Poker, polkadots, same difference, right?

via Twitter for iPhone

That last tweet didn’t start out all negative and cynical; that’s just the VALUE I ADDED with my social media expertise. You’re welcome.

via Twitter for iPhone

Is now a social media expert. That’s still the cool thing to be doing right? Tell your friends to follow me for useless tips and shit.

via Twitter for iPhone

RT @ericasadun: A little preview of Draw: http://bit.ly/3eskOg I’ve been working on this with Brett Terpstra (@ttscoff) - wow, looks great!

via Twitter for iPhone

Had fun playing poker at Bill’s. Would have been more fun if it weren’t for that Jack on the river, but that’s how it goes, I guess. #fb

via Twitter for iPhone

RT @hotdogsladies Housekeeping put the plastic cover they found on my toothbrush. Which is super-nice if it had actually belonged to me.

via Twitterrific

RT @swirlee I like to do Parkour without all the running, leaping, and rolling. I call it Porkeur.

via Twitterrific

Every morning I’m terrified my electric razor is going to die when I’m only 1/2 done shaving.

via Twitter for iPhone

Apple’s app store may be profitable now, but …

http://bit.ly/2lmL1x

via Twitter for iPhone

I’m just really stressed about the bake sale.

via Twitter for iPhone

I still have an ear plugged after being very sick last week. It’s remarkable how off-balance and distracted a plugged ear can make you.

via Twitterrific

Is seeing a rainbow on the way to work a good sign? (photo) http://yfrog.com/b6ywjsj

via Twitter for iPhone

RT @ttscoff Does “Remember password” mean nothing to you, iTunes? It’s like talking to a wall, but with more iPhone apps involved.

via Twitterrific

RT @badbanana If you eat a balanced breakfast, everything else is part of a balanced breakfast. Including a bottle of rum 14 hours later.

via Twitterrific

Gladwell says to be an expert takes spending 10,000 hours of practice. I think I’m now an expert at blowing my nose and looking like a hobo.

via Twitterrific

.@gruber seems to ask for features @evernote has, but won’t accept it as a solution. Their iPhone app needs work, but better than nothing.

via Twitterrific

@geehoneybee Nahh, slamming football doesn’t count as being negative; it counts as having taste / using my brain / being reasonable. :-p

via Twitter for iPhone in reply to geehoneybee

And I’m all like whatevs, yo!

via Twitter for iPhone

I just found out my wife hates my Twitter persona. And that I’m not witty, especially when I try to be. & my avatar is ugly. I’m ok, sniff.

via Twitter for iPhone

I retweeted some teasing about #nanowrimo earlier, but it’s definitely a valuable exercise. http://bit.ly/2mJ6Yh But why November?

via Twitter for iPhone

My frozen lasagna doesn’t look anything like the package. I’m shocked, SHOCKED, I say! Not bad, though, considering…

via Twitterrific

RT @AmyJane Just an idea: Take a few months and write a good novel. No rush.

via Twitterrific

Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference. ~ Winston Churchill

via Twitterrific

Yes, it’s MY fault that you can’t type the password that YOU chose correctly into the log-in field at least once in 3 tries correctly.

via Twitterrific

So now I know why we don’t normally eat candy for dinner.

I need a do-over. #fb

via Twitter for iPhone

@nbradbury I’ll find out whether I can do that.

via Twitter for iPhone in reply to nbradbury

Why are parents of young children surprised that they didn’t sleep in when we turned our clocks back? Can’t remember back one year?

via Twitter for iPhone

Because they’re slow and boring, get it? No, but seriously… they are.

via Twitter for iPhone

I just figured out why there’s so much tweeting about baseball and football: because there’s TIME to tweet when watching those sports. Lots.

via Twitter for iPhone

@nbradbury Many products are “branded” differently than their ownership, which is what I thought was being implied. Mea Culpa

via Twitter for iPhone in reply to nbradbury

@nbradbury Thanks for clarifying, and to @strutting for updating the post.

via Twitter for iPhone in reply to nbradbury

@nbradbury Sorry, I misinterpreted what being NewsGator-branded meant (& didnt mean) for FeedDemon in the DLS post (http://bit.ly/4i9mwE).

via Twitter for iPhone in reply to nbradbury

Her: If I die, miss me a lot.
Me: (surprised) Uh, I’d probably be incapacitated.
Her: Yeah, that’s good… do that.

via Twitter for iPhone

So how you wanna kick it, gonna kick it root down

via Twitterrific